Dream Bigger

Last Thursday Ann Marie asked me, "Keala, how would your life be different if you had ten times more confidence?"

That question stumped me initially because I consider myself a pretty confident person.  My first thought was, "I cannot be more confident than I am now.  I am very confident."  Then I thought, "Wait a minute.  I could be more confident and people would consider me as BOLD!"

My answer to Ann Marie was, "Ten times more confidence?  I think I'm pretty confident now, but if I had ten times more confidence then I'd be a formidable force to be reckoned with.  I'd be super successful.  I'd be up there with Oprah!"

That's when it dawned on me that I too could stand to up my confidence level.  I too could stand to Dream Bigger.  I use that term "Dream Bigger" because what Ann Marie was really doing was daring me to Dream Bigger, Be Better, Ask for MORE, Live My Best Life.


How would your life be different if you had 10x more confidence?

Where am I ?

Can u guess?

Location : 1501-1599 Wayne St, Columbia, SC 29201,

Get Widdit!

For the past 2-3 weeks I don’t feel that I have been “widdit”.  I have been having trouble concentrating.  Strangely though, I have not had trouble sticking to certain tasks once I got started with them.

I have been feeling like I am doing something wrong.  Not living up to my potential.  Not following my true calling.  I have had this nagging feeling that I should be working in the health care field.  Ugh.  Back in 2006 I was seriously considering going back to school to get a degree in Physical Therapy.  The main things that kept me in my current field were the money and me not wanting to make such a drastic change.

I can do it.  I know I can.  Something is blocking me.  I am blocking myself.  Fear of losing the current salary I have.  Fear of changing my life so drastically in so many ways. 

I must be honest with myself.  I need to write down exactly what I want and how I want it.  I’ve been avoiding what’s true.  I’ve been avoiding my Dharma and it shows in every aspect of me and my life.  My bedroom turned into another mess about two weeks ago and I have not made any effort to fix it.  Despite the fact that I’ve been working out and eating right, I feel pregnant.  I hate it.

Work.  I like my job.  I like the work that I do.  However, I am not passionate about it.  I think that’s my problem.  I have no passion for this job.  I have moments when I get passionately frustrated.  But I do not have moments when I am passionately pleased or happy.  I do have those satisfied/pleased with my work moments.  I just cannot remember having a PASSION for this work.  If I ever did, I don’t remember it now.

In any event, that’s what I want.  I want to have a PASSION for the work that I do.  I want to love my job.  I want to love doing what I do on a daily basis.  I mean really LOVE it.

I embrace my Responsibility Affirmation for today:

“I no longer spend my time in fruitless activities, associations, or relationships.  I surround myself with people who honor my path, who manifest a positive attitude, who are empowering, & who are willing to give and receive my help.”  I had to delete some people from my life because they don’t fit this description.

§         I see my days beginning with yoga, meditation, prayer, reading, and writing.

§         Light housework.

§         Getting the boys started.  Assisting the boys in getting started with their day.  Overseeing the boys on the beginning of their day.  Guiding the boys on the beginning of their day.

§         A quick refreshing walk.

§         Breakfast.

§         Fulfilling work that I love and am passionate about.  Work in a field that fits who I am. 

§         Having a full productive day that I know matters in the grand scheme of things.

§         Home, family time, homework, dinner, light chores, self love, family love.

There.  I did it.  Next step is to go into more detail of a typical weekday and then a typical weekend.

Note:  All of this could have easily been prompted by a few personal things going in my life such as Cynthia’s situation, my cousin Timothy, and my step father’s illness all occurring at the same time.

~~Namaste

Week In Review

Warning: This entry is just a bunch of my ramblings during my boring down time. Please don't take it too seriously.

I think I may start playing with HTML again. Get serious about my skills. Something has to change in my life.

Add http://www.distancehealer.net/index.htm to stumble. Susan is a wonderful and beautiful person. She lived about 3 houses down from me for at least 3 to 4 years before I moved into my own home.

Today is a good day. I am enjoying my work and the space I reside in. Life is good. Life is damn GREAT!

The Truth by India.Arie reminds me of Doug. I love that song and I love that man.

Add http://www.pandora.com/ to stumble as well.

http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/zenhabits/~3/260984681/

http://sharonhurleyhall.com/

It's 3:10 pm and I am sleepy. I guess those Emerald Nuts commercials are true. Yall better be careful with that 3pm energy zapper. I went to the vending machine to get some nuts but sadly they were not Emerald's. I guess I'll just have to quietly find a place to go snooze and pray nobody misses me.

I had a cube visitor and the visit woke me up. Feeling much better now.

Last week was my birthday and it was beautiful. Doug took me to Ruth's Chris on Tuesday. I had a party on Friday. Herman bought both of my cakes: a red velvet and a rainbow sheet cake. My friends and family came out to help celebrate. We had fun.

On Saturday I had the Cloud Nine treatment at Urban Nirvana thanks to wonderful Doug. God I appreciate that man. He's coming to fix my bathroom plumbing tonight. Literally, not figuratively.

I know I have only been blogging on a weekly basis, but I'm trying to get back to my normal schedule. My schedule got messed up when I decided to blog only on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and weekends. Big mistake. That schedule did not work out well for me. So, I am back to testing which schedule will suit my life better. I have been diligently avoiding feature creep on my life and I love the results.

Some friends invited me to dinner tonight. I am not sure if it's for me or them. They called the day of my birthday to say they wanted to take me to dinner that night. Well, if you know me, you know I already had plans and I hate last minute invites like that. Ugh. So they asked me to pencil them in my schedule. (I went to all you can eat crab legs with those people. I'm not talking to them anymore because I hurt myself with those crab legs. They didn't even warn me that the legs were that good.....*scratching my arms wanting more*)

The baby shower for my grandbaby is April 26^th. It is suppose to be at my home, but I may change that location. I'll be sending out the invitations this week. I need to double check with my mom because she's sending out invites as well.

I remember writing a review about a site that helps with showers and special occasions. I may have to dig that site back up to get some help with our shower. We shall see. For those of you care, we are registered at Target. You can go to Target.com and look up the gift registry for father Anthony Jacobs in SC and Mother Christina Macon in SC. Go on and buy them a gift from Target and have it delivered to the address in the registry.

Successfully Completed

I have written over 33 entries about this goal.

It was so well worth it. It forced me to recognize all that is good in life. Whenever I was having a bad day, all I had to do was write my daily gratitude list. I am so happy I did this.

Today is Thursday, January 3, 2008 and I am thankful

• that I assumed this exercise and successfully applied it to my life for all of November 2007, and most of December 2007.

• that I rollerskated for 2 hours last night

• that I am not totally dependent on someone else for my livelihood

• that my family is supportive and loving

• that the walls in my living room are a bright and vibrant YELLOW

• that I have this beautiful red sofa in my living room. I love the contrast of the red and yellow

• for all of my blog readers. Go click on an ad link and make me some money. Better yet, click on my paypal donate button. LOL

• for 43Things.com

• for new beginnings and great things in 2008. I am looking forward to a wonderful life in 2008.

Happy New Year 2008 and have a beautiful day.

See more progress on: be thankful

Life Partners

Life Partners

The day I got married I told myself that if it didn't work out I could get a divorce. Little did I know that the moment new life entered me I would change my mind. Once my son was born, I wanted to be life partners with his father. Obviously that plan did not succeed.

A life partner can be described as a romantic partner for life. My own personal definition of a life partner is similar yet somewhat different. A life partner is more than just a romantic partner for life. My life partner is the person who is my friend for life, my confidant for life, my caretaker for life, my caregiver for life, my partner in crime for life, my most special friend for life. My life partner is the man who wants to spend the rest of his life living with me, sharing with me, caring with me, being with me, tolerating all of me in all of my glory and my many moods de jeur and vice versa. I reciprocate all of the above to my life partner and then some.

While I will agree that a life partner is also a romantic partner for life, I submit that a life partner accepts that there may or may not be other temporary and sporadic romantic interests throughout life, but none that are permanent but him.

My life partner loves me unconditionally and accepts all of my glory and flaws. I do the same for him.

My life partner knows that I have interests outside of our special relationship and accepts them as they are. I do the same for him.

My life partner knows that I will always come home to him. I know he will always come home to me. He has provided a safe place called home just for me. My life partner understands how important home is to me.

My life partner knows that I want no one else but him. My life partner wants no one but me. I am all the woman he needs, desires, and wants. He is more than enough man for me. My life partner is not jealous of other relationships I have cultivated outside of our life partnership. I am secure with my life partner's other relationships because he is my chosen partner for life. He is committed to me and I am commited to him.

I have been told that because I married so young I did not have the opportunity to live life fully and have all of the fun young people are supposed to have. That may be true. However since my divorce I have had my share of "dates" and experiences with the opposite sex. I have experienced enough to know what I want and what I do not want. I have decided that I do want a life partnership versus that other intermittent stuff I have experienced over the years. I have had my share of so called fun. I can have fun with my life partner. He's cool with me and he trusts me.

How

is this possible with 1-2-3 sons?

See more progress on: live simply

The Gift of Life

I would say this is by far the most significant gift I have ever received. Otherwise I would be writing this and you would not be reading this. Every day I awake I am re-gifted this gift. Life is beautiful, wonderful, painful, joyful, a rollercoaster, exciting, full of lessons, the best gift ever and every adjective you can think of.

The day was March 25, 1970. I was the first born to my parents John and Brenda. They did their best to give me a good life. They both love me dearly and I am happy to have received the gift of life through them. I am grateful to have them as parents.

Life is a precious gift. Live it to the fullest. Enjoy it. Revel in it. Appreciate it. Treat it like the gift it is.

See more progress on: List every gift I remember receiving

Today is Sunday, November 11, 2007

and I am thankful for:

• friends
• family
• life
• love
• children
• deer meat. A coworker gave me some deer meat cube steaks and grounded deer meat. I cooked the cube steak today and it was delicious. Deer meat is tender, wild, and full of protein.
• motherhood. Although being a mom is hard work, I must say it is absolutely the best assignment I've ever had. Being a mom is over fulfilling and very rewarding. I love being a mom.

Today is Monday, November 5, 2007

and I am thankful for:

• Lessons learned. Life lessons you learn just by living from day to day. I've learned so much over the years and I keep what I learn. I am thankful that I can apply what I learn to new situations.
• Depression no more. I was talking with my mom the other day and she was telling me how proud she is of my growth over the past two years. She mentioned my temporary depression and how proud she was that I came out of it without her help. I am thankful that I applied what God gave me to overcome that crying affair with the couch.
• The $100 I found in my purse this morning! Yes, I found 5 twenty dollar bills folded up in my purse this morning. The Universe is GOD and good to me!
• This forum to share my blessings with.
• Abuse NO MORE. I am so happy that I am no longer living an abusive life. I am so thankful that I have learned to identify the characteristics of an abusive person. I can now avoid all of that and not make the same mistakes I've made in the past.
• The fact that I no longer attract abusiveness into my life. I have learned to love me unconditionally and I accept nothing less from the outside world. If you can't love the way I love me or better, then there is no room for you in my life.
• The fact that my children recognize the above and are living it in their lives as well.
• The fact that I have so much to be thankful for. Life is good. God is good. The Universe is most splendid to me.

Have a most splendid day!